Posts in NATURE
Fit To Consume

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Pomelo blossoms in Hanoi, Vietnam, from daily sketches.

Pomelo blossoms in Hanoi, Vietnam, from daily sketches.

The pomelo, a South East Asian fruit, serves as a metaphor for what 19th century sculptor Harriet Hosmer understood about how time can shape and sweeten us.


A traditional snack or after dinner digestive in Vietnam consists of a plate of pomelo (bu’o’i) and a small bowl of salt in which to dip the fleshy pieces of citrus. The ceremony is akin to a Southern feast of salted watermelon which is equally refreshing but that’s where the similarities end.

Whereas watermelons ripen over the span of months to sweeten, pomelos take 20 years according to local lore. To be clear, a pomelo flower blooms and in a matter of months a weighty orb appears, but it will never be eaten. Instead, it will be plucked and placed on an altar, an offering alongside cans of Coke and tins of butter cookies. Year after year, this routine is repeated until two decades have passed and the tree, finally mature, relinquishes its sweetest offering—edible fruit.

There is something beautiful about the relationship between the Vietnamese and their pomelos. Before the fruit is ready to eat by the living, it feeds and honors the dead. Perhaps unintentional, delayed gratification makes the pomelo's eventual consumption yields something sweeter. It's also usually eaten communally, the way consecrated bread is broken in Mass, underscoring the sacred in the moment. It's meaning multiplied among cherished company.

The tree offering the fruit serves a purpose. In the landscape of Southeast Asia, tree blossoms dominate several seasons, punctuating the sky with colorful constellations—purple, red and yellow—while pomelo blossoms appear as quietly as Venus, twinkling across a verdant canvas. Clipped, they last a few days at most. And yet it’s not their form people seek, it’s their scent.

…pomelo blossoms appear as quietly as Venus, twinkling across a verdant canvas.

At $5-7 per kilogram, a posy is the same price as two armfuls of Oriental lilies. Before commercial shampoo was widely available in Vietnam, women would steep the blossoms in water to perfume their hair. Today some women still wash their hair with the blossoms, but most people use them in their offerings as a way to bless the year to come.

By the time pomelo fruit arrives on the plate of most consumers, its Mother tree has gone through a seemingly endless production of fruit. Each sphere emerges and swells one season closer to perfection. Herein lies the parallel of human growth which Harriet Hosmer, considered the most distinguished American sculptor to date, illuminated within her lifetime.

Engraving of Harriet Hosmer depicting her at age 43 by Augustus Robin. The engraving appeared in Eminent Women of the Age by James Parton.

Engraving of Harriet Hosmer depicting her at age 43 by Augustus Robin. The engraving appeared in Eminent Women of the Age by James Parton.

In the mid-1800s, just after her twentieth year, Harriet lived and worked alone in a Roman studio. This was a time when women had little agency over their particular development, let alone housing arrangements. Initially escorted to Rome by her father who was instrumental in her development as an artist and intellectual, she settled in peacefully alongside an artistic ex-pat community within a world that was on the brink of civil.

Just as the scent of a pomelo bloom intoxicates upon first opening, Harriet must have been drunk on her newfound freedom, shaping not only marble but each moment of her life. Hosmer’s dedication to her artistic blossoming resulted in exceptional works of art, not only in their crafts(wo)manship, but especially their genius. Writing in her journal about the way in which she had moved toward maturity, Harriet limned, “My life is so unlike what it was then. I think and feel so differently it seems to me I must have left my former body and found another…. These changes make me feel twenty years older.” Despite the rumblings of war, life was sweet for Hosmer in Rome, so much so that she dreaded return of any kind to America. How did she create her dolce vita? She produced year after year until the fruit she bore was fit to consume.

 
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Today is International Women’s Day. In Vietnam, where women are largely credited with winning the American War, there’s a particular celebratory feeling afoot. While America champions Women’s History Month often spotlighting women who’ve achieved stratospheric success, here and in other parts of the world, the everyday woman is lauded.

With this in mind, who are the women in your immediate world? How have they contributed to your growth and development? How have you contributed to theirs? What fruit have you produced together?

Women often downplay the contributions they make to every day, forward movement of life. I invite you to reflect on the seemingly small acts that nurture the sweetness in your life.


Coucou Home is a place to feel refreshed, find heart sustenance, and heal your spirit. For this reason, it will always be ad-free. If you enjoy my work and value creativity in the world, please consider becoming a patron by making a donation in any amount. Your support is greatly appreciated! Thank you!

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The Nature of Feeling Grounded

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Grounding practices enrich creative flow, but how can you ground yourself in busy cities—let alone a busy life? Here are some tips to get started.


A few years ago I began meditating. Before that, I participated in closing my eyes at the end of yoga, and occasionally sat in lotus position when I felt particularly frazzled. Over the years, I’ve developed that practice into something I do every day. So when I proudly told my reiki teacher about what I felt was a personal accomplishment, she challenged me, “That’s great for clearing your mind, but how are you grounding yourself?”

Creativity requires roots. Ideas start in your head but once planted, they need direction to grow. For me, grounding nurtures those roots and creates a focus for life energy (qi) to manifest into a physical experience. The most simple grounding practice, and arguably most fun, is to kick off your shoes and stand on the ground. From here you can visualize yourself rooting into the ground. However, the act of connecting with Earth and loved ones, and being aware of the connection, is most important.

Grounding practices enrich creative flow. Unfortunately, for those of us in big cities, finding a grassy patch is like being on a treasure hunt in which few find the loot. The last time I was barefoot I was sprinting across the hot coals of a Vietnamese beach to cool water. Before that, it was the summer in Wales when I ditched my shoes and walked circles around a prickly field. By the end of the two weeks, I’d written and completed a short story. In Vietnam, where I live it’s different. I shared my no-nature dilemma with my teacher.

"Touch a tree," she said. "It’s that easy."

 
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If you’re like me and want to incorporate a regular grounding practice, check out this video for a 10 minute, straightforward practice. In the future, I may create a practice to share, but this is the practice that introduced me to grounding meditation. Check it out!

If you live near nature, or even have a small patch of Earth, spend a few moments standing on the Earth. You can visualize yourself growing roots, connecting with the ground and spreading the roots to loved ones. Once a week, for a few minutes is a great start to this practice. Soon, you’ll find yourself doing it whenever you need to recharge and feel tethered.

Even I have trees in my neighborhood, so pause and touch a tree that attracts you. Many of our trees blossom, so be sure to admire all aspect of the tree, not just the trunk, which helps to nourish the blooms, but the blooms too. They make a big sacrifice to ensure the continuation of life.

Finally, bring nature indoors. I make clippings and disperse them throughout my house. Unfortunately, potted plants don’t do well for me inside my home. I also diffuse natural, wood scented essential oils like Cypress, Douglas and Siberian Fir. There’s science behind the use of these wood-based essential oils which you can read more about here.


Coucou Home is a place to feel refreshed, find heart sustenance, and heal your spirit. For this reason, it will always be ad-free. If you enjoy my work and value creativity in the world, please consider becoming a patron by making a donation in any amount. Your support is greatly appreciated! Thank you!

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NATUREMary Warnerstories
Mirror Time

Take a moment to read the philosophy behind Coucou Home. If you connect with it, then sign up for my monthly newsletter. 


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Tuning into the movements of nature, especially the cycle of the moon can create “mirror time”, that critical space in our life that allows for self-examination. Do how do you begin?


Fireworks, spring blossoms, and at least for this year, pigs, marked the beginning of the Chinese New Year. The feeling of being between places in year two of what one friend calls my “Lotus Years” is more pronounced than ever. Questions of “Will I ever fit in?” have been replaced with “What can I learn?” or “What can I create?” Most of the answers reveal themselves to me during the period that marks Christmas in the West and the New Year in the East.

During the dark, month-long period between festivities is the hope of a new moon, which also marks the beginning of a new Lunar year in most of Asia. It’s a quiet time for me as I’m not Asian, and one I’ve chosen to dedicate to reflection.

Brooding over new beginnings feels luxurious to me and it’s probably foreign to you. In the West, we really have to fight for “mirror time” as I call it, that critical space in our lives for self-examination. It feels selfish, New Age-y, or both, so we settle for a one sentence New Year’s resolution that will be a footnote to our post-holiday recovery. Without a plan though, our best intentions will almost always vaporize.

In the West, January 1st follows so closely on the heels on feet worn down from shopping that there’s no time to reflect on what a New Year means, let alone what it can hold, or what we need to do to achieve our wildest dreams. That’s why for me the anticipation of the Lunar New Year with its rituals and dark moon, itself a harbinger of the unknown, offers the necessary time to slowly and intentionally cultivate plans for endless possibility. Why don’t you claim it, too?

This year afforded a relatively clear view of the sky, at least until it became filled with smoke from fireworks and fires. Even still, I had to search for my friend. I don’t always know where it is, disoriented as I am by this still new geography and the haze of pollution. Most of the time, I have to rely on my imagination and an app to visualize the moon in its current state. Whether imagined or real, however, I always offer it gratitude. When I do this, I am connected to the true pace of life — slow, steady and always becoming.


Coucou Home is a place to feel refreshed, find heart sustenance, and heal your spirit. For this reason, it will always be ad-free. If you enjoy my work and value creativity in the world, please consider becoming a patron by making a donation in any amount. Your support is greatly appreciated! Thank you!

Donate
NATUREMary Warnerstories